Daria – The Dance Remix of Scenes That Should Never Happen


A short piece where Daria gets to do some computer programing for Quinn and Jane.

Read it. You’ll understand it at the end. 🙂

Daria looked in amazement once again at her sister and her best friend sitting side by side at Daria’s computer. They had been there for ages now and neither one of them had given her the slightest clue as to what they were up to. She sighed under her breath and sat down on the floor of her bedroom with the glass of milk and plate of cookies that she had just gone downstairs for. After a sip of milk and a bite of cookie, she picked up her copy of “Nuclear War: What’s In It For You?” written by the Ground Zero War Foundation and began reading again.

“Daria? We need your help,” Quinn asked while her view stayed glued on the screen.

“Really? You two seem to be doing fine without me.”

“Oh, come on Daria. Quinn had this great idea for a boyfriend tracker and we’ve been doing the coding. But we’re stuck.”

“I want to call it `Your Boyfriend’ but Jane wants to call it `List of Stinky Guys I’ve Known Since Grade 1.’ I like my title better.”

“A boyfriend tracker? Well, I guess with the number of boyfriends that the two of you go thru, I guess maybe that’s a good idea.” She stood and came up behind them, peering into the screen. “What’s the problem?”

“Well, we’re writing this code…” Quinn started in.

“You two are writing code?” Daria’s eyebrows went up.

“Quinn got Joey, Jeffy, and Jamie…” Jane explained.

“Jamie? I thought his name was Jamiel.”

“..Jamie to write the code for us and Upchuck debugged it. Problem is Upchuck made all sort of improvments…”

“He added a field for the number of fats food resturant toys a boy has. Who cares about that?” Quinn pouted.

“Now we’ve got to get rid of all this extra garbage stuck in here and…”

“…And who cares what music they listen to. When I’m on a date with them, we get to listen to the music that I want to.”

“…make the program simplier,” Daria filled in. She wacked the arms of Quinn and Jane. “Move over.”

Daria was quickly cutting and pasting. Quinn and Jane took a moment to look around the room. They spy the snack sitting on the floor and quickly eat up the goodies.

Daria turns with a smirk.

“Jane? Quinn? I’ve KISSed Your Boyfriend.”

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